


Slowly making the galaxy go insane

by TheOneAndOnly66



Series: Chaotic Clone Wars [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Humor, Kix wants to lock some people in an insane asylum, Multi, Pranks and Practical Jokes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:20:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 2,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27201025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOneAndOnly66/pseuds/TheOneAndOnly66
Summary: Alex, his troops, Anakin, Ahsoka,their troops,Obi Wan, his troops,and others cause chaos amongst themselves and throughout the galaxy.Takes place almost immediately after Relaxation?
Relationships: Ahsoka Tano & Clone Troopers, Ahsoka Tano & Original Clone Trooper Character(s), Ahsoka Tano & Original Jedi Character(s), Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano, Anakin Skywalker & Original Jedi Character(s), CT-7567 | Rex/Ahsoka Tano, Original Clone Character(s) & Original Jedi Character(s)
Series: Chaotic Clone Wars [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2047571
Kudos: 8
Collections: Chaotic Clone Wars, ShoreLeave





	1. Greyhair's backstory

**Author's Note:**

> I own nothing but my characters.
> 
> Usernames
> 
> ShipCrasher77- Anakin  
> SuperAlex543- Alex  
> Orange thing- Ahsoka  
> High_Ground- Obi Wan  
> Rexting while fighting- Rex  
> YoungOldMan- Greyhair  
> Charger- Charger  
> GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY- Kix  
> Fivetimesthefun- Fives

SuperAlex543 has joined the chat Chaotic Goodness. 

SuperAlex543: Ahsoka you no longer are an inch shorter than me. 

Orange thing: wait did you shrink because it's only been like three months. 

SuperAlex543: Nope I grew taller. 

Orange thing: what like an inch.

SuperAlex543: NOPE. I grew a little over two and a half inches. 

Orange thing: nope I refuse to believe that. There's no way you could have grown almost three inches.

SuperAlex543: it's true. If you don't believe me ask my medic Greyhair. 

YoungOldMan: it's TRUE he grew almost three inches. 

Orange thing: you know I've been wondering why are you called greyhair? 

YoungOldMan: I blame Alex.

Charger: grey hair is a sign of stress or old age. Us clones normally can't get stressed enough to get grey hair. Yet with Alex being our General and Greyhair being our medic Alex goes to medbay a lot so Greyhair has gotten so stressed out by Alex that his hair has gone grey. 

GET_YOUR_SHEBS_TO_THE_MEDBAY: Anakin you and Ahsoka better not give me any grey hairs. 

Fivetimesthefun: he means anymore grey hairs. He already has one.

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: how do you know that 

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: I mean what are you talking about

Fivetimesthefun: I found him crying in the medbay over it. Here I took a video.

Fivetimesthefun: kix.crying.over.grey.hair.vid

High_Ground: lol

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: Stop bullying me 😭😭😭

High_Ground: No

Rexting while fighting: Skywalker has rubbed off on him.

ShipCrasher77: no I haven't. 

SuperAlex543: oh but you have. 

ShipCrasher77: whatever. 

ShipCrasher77 has left the chat. 

SuperAlex543: baby.


	2. Where Alex gets his blackmail material from

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New usernames
> 
> High on sugar- Ahsoka  
> Di'kut- Charger  
> REGgie- Echo

SuperAlex543 has changed Charger to Di'kut.

SuperAlex543 has changed Orange thing to high on sugar.

Rexting while fighting: do I even want to know why?

Greyhair: no

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: No.

SuperAlex543: Charger was a di'kut because he gave Ahsoka candy. He also didn't get as far away as possible from her. And Ahsoka is high on sugar. 

Rexting while fighting: I can understand why Ahsoka isn't here to defend herself but where's Charger?

Greyhair: medbay.

Rexting while fighting: why?

SuperAlex543: he was the first of many casualties. If you go in to the mess you'll see a clone shaped dent in the wall. 

Rexting while fighting: I thought that was from Fives from when you threw him for whatever reason. 

SuperAlex543: first of all that was in the hanger second of all he told me to throw him. 

Fivetimesthefun: how many times do I have to tell you. I was drunk and you shouldn't listen to me when I'm drunk. 

SuperAlex543: but it's fun to hear what you have to say. Where else do you think I get all of mgt blackmail material on you. Actually that's how I get all of my blackmail material. 

ShipCrasher77: on who. 

SuperAlex543: everyone. 

Rexting while fighting: who sho thou have the most on? 

SuperAlex543: Fives. 75% of it comes from Fives when she's drunk.

Rexting while fighting: she's?! 🤣🤣🤣

Fivetimesthefun: you take that back or else I'll end you. 

SuperAlex543: you try and I'll tell everyone the list of people you have a crush on in this chat. 

Fivetimesthefun: nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Rexting while fighting: anyway where does the other 25% of your blackmail info on Fives come from. 

SuperAlex543: Echo. 

REGgie: Alex you promised not to tell anyone!

SuperAlex543: I had my fingers crossed. 

REGgie: why you little...

SuperAlex543: I'm taller than you. 

REGgie: I am two inches taller than you. 

SuperAlex543: nope your height is an illusion your actually 5'5".

REGgie: how

SuperAlex543: I shrunk you in your sleep. 

REGgie: is anyone else's higher an illusion. 

SuperAlex543: Fives's height sort of it's his body is 55.55 inches tall and his head is 16.45 inches. We joked that he had sutch a big head so I decided to give him a big head.

Fivetimesthefun: jdjdidkxjdjcysjenek

Fivetimesthefun has left the chat. 

Rexting while fighting: Alex run hes coming for you.

SuperAlex543: good luck with that I'm not even on the ship. Heck I'm not even in this universe.

Rexting while driving: I'm not even going to ask I've learned it's bad for your health.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm accepting ideas for chapters let me know in the comments if you have any.


	3. The 600th's rules Pt. 1

1\. Alex is not allowed to do anything anywhere at any time.   
1b. And no it doesn't matter that it's impossible. 

1\. c. You can also use any means necessary   
2\. Don't give Ahsoka coffee she will not be held responsible for her actions.   
3\. Do not, under any circumstances, even if the fate of the universe depends on it, or your ordered to, don't prank Alex or Ahsoka. You will become the laughing stock of the ship. Just ask Skywalker.   
4\. Don't mention Ahsoka and Rex's relationship   
5\. Don't mention Skywalker and Senator Amidala's relationship either.  
6\. Don't come up with your own 'tragic backstory' after you hear Alex's. He's the only person here with one.  
7\. Hardcase is not allowed to be within 600,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 miles of Alex.   
8\. Alex isn't allowed allowed said distance near Hardcase.   
9\. Alex and Hardcase don't have to follow these rules.   
10\. Rule number 9 is invalid.  
11\. Alex is not allowed make rules  
12\. Rule number 9 in valid and rule 11 is now invalid.   
13\. Rule 12 is invalid.   
14\. Hardcase is no longer able to make rules and to whoever allowed him to in the first place Kix will hunt you down, find you, and slowly break every bone in your body while naming them.  
15\. Kix, stop trying to kill Alex. I'm pretty sure he's immortal.   
16\. I am. -Alex  
17\. Won't stop me from trying. -Kix  
18\. Alex, please try not to destroy Kix's things.  
19\. As master Yoda says "Do or do not, there is no try." -Alex  
20\. Alex no more creating black holes in Kix's office. He just got his new medical certificate after you disintegrated his last one.  
21\. I ate it actually. -Alex   
22\. Alex, no more eating paper. Its un healthy.  
23\. In my defense I forgot it was on the ice cream cone. -Alex   
24\. Alex, stop acting like you control the 600th. Because it's both the 501st and 99th combined you and Skywalker share command because you are the Generals of you respective unit.  
25\. Alex, give Skywalker the rank of General back. Ahsoka being General is destroying what little sanity the 501st still has.  
26\. Don't put things about Ahsoka where she can see them unless they are 100% nice things about her.  
27\. Don't say mean things about ahsoka when she's in the same room. She has good hearing. Same goes for Alex. He somehow has godly hearing.  
28\. Don't say mean things about them at all.   
29\. Don't make Ahsoka cry or else you will have an angry Rex and an angry Alex after you. The Jedi Code may say no to anger but Alex doesn't care when it comes to Ahsoka. You will have a slow and painful demise.   
30\. Alex, stop making Kix bang his head on the wall or anything else. He doesn't have any braincells to spare.   
31.Don't insult Kix or else your next checkup will be painful.


	4. Name changes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New usernames 
> 
> Sings in shower: Ahsoka   
> Romeo/Also sings in shower: Alex  
> Small💩: Fives  
> HuttLover77: Anakin   
> Rexing Ball: Rex

High on sugar: why is this my name.

SuperAlex543: your sugar high last week.

Di'kut: why is this my name. 

SuperAlex543: you caused Ahsoka's sugar high.

High on sugar changed their name to Orange thing. 

SuperAlex543 has changed orange thing to Sings in shower.

Sings in shower: how do you know about this. 

SuperAlex543: you room is literally right across the hall from mine.

Sings in shower: but you're never in there.

SuperAlex543: that's cuz I live in the vents.

Sings in shower has changed SuperAlex543 to Romeo.

Romeo: what was that for

Sings in shower:cuz your a salker.

Fivetimesthefun: no wait this is even better.

Fivetimesthefun has changed Romeo to also sings in shower.

Also sings in shower: Fives you little piece of...

Rexting while fighting: RIP Fives ☠☠☠

ShipCrasher77 has changed Fivetimesthefun to Small💩.

Small💩: General Skywalker!!!!!!

Small💩 has changed ShipCrasher77 to HuttLover77.

HuttLover77: Fives.......

HuttLover77 has left the chat. 

Also sings in shower: Fives.

Also sings in shower: Run.

Small💩 has left the chat.

Also sings in shower has left the chat.

Sings in shower has left the chat.

Rexting while fighting: I'm going to go destroy Fives's Hope's and dreams. 

Rexting while fighting has left the chat: 

Di'kut has changed Rexting while fighting to Rexing Ball. 

Di'kut has left the chat.


	5. Mortis

Also sings in shower has changed their name to SuperAlex543. 

SuperAlex543: ight, so Anakin, Ahsoka, and I. Are going to go check out this ancient distress call so Charger you're temporarily in command. Don't do anything that I wouldn't do. 

Di'kut: ok.

Sings in shower has changed SuperAlex543 to The real force god.

Rexing Ball: what the heck happend? 

Sings in shower: you don't want to know.

Rexing Ball: also what's up with Alex's new name.

Sings in shower: so there were these force gods right. And the dark side one goes and tries to pick Alex up and carry him away but Alex just goes and dissolves the guys feet and then proceeds to chuck him all the way through a cliff with the force.  
So the light side one that was going to carry me away just transforms back into her human-like form and is just standing there like 'how the heck did he do that' cuz apparently only Anakin's supposed to be able to do that because he's 'The Chosen One'.  
Then the third one who was some old dude appears with Anakin, who looks like he's about to puke, and is like 'hey look it's my favorite nephew' I kid you not, that's what he said. So it turns Alex is related to them and he's like their favorite family member due to the fact that he has all of their powers times a million. So yeah hes more powerful than him and yeah they want to be added to this chat so yeah. Also don't change their names. 

The real force god has added The Father, The Daughter, and The Son to Chaotic Goodness.


	6. The new apprentice.

The real force god has added CT-6383 to the chat. 

CT-6383 has changed their name to Wedge.

The real force god changed Wedge to Wedge of cheese

The real force god has added Bella Tzu to the chat.

Sings in shower: Who are these people. 

The real force god: another one of my clones and my new padawan.

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD LET YOU TEACH!?!?!?!?!?

YoungOldMan: I ask myself that every day. 

Bella Tzu: So like who is every one?

The real force god: rolecall everyone. 

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: Kix 

Sings in shower: Ahsoka Tano. 

HuttLover77: Anakin Skywalker. 

Small💩: Fives.

Di'kut: Charger 

Rexing Ball: Rex

REGgie: Echo

Wedge of cheese: Wedge.

High_Ground: Obi Wan Kenobi. 

YoingOldMan: Greyhair. 

The Daughter: The Daughter.

The Father: The Father 

The Son: The Son. 

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: anyways let's get back to the fact that Alex was allowed to teach. 

Bella Tzu: why wouldn't he be allowed to 

Small💩: oh you sweet innocent child.

REGgie has Changed Bella Tzu to Sweet innocent child. 

Sweet innocent child: why?

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: have you not read your master's file?

Sweet innocent child: no. Why?

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: if you read it you'll know why.

Sweet innocent child: ok...

Sweet innocent child has changed their name to I need an adult. 

Rexing Ball: don't we all kid. Don't we all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm accepting ideas for chapters. Leave a comment if you have one.


	8. The change of the code

LowGrounder77 has changed their name to ShipCrasher77. 

ShipCrasher77: hey Alex, how did you get the council to change the code to allow relationships? 

The real force god: Well during one of the council meetings, Master Window brought up Anakin's 'secret' relationship with Padme.

ShipCrasher77: why were you there?

The real force god: I'm on the council. But, I never go to meetings. Window threw a fit the first couple times. Then I brought up the window incident. He stopped complaining. 

Sings in shower: lol

The real force god: anyways I said we should allow relationships. Everyone on the council, except Window, agreed because they also had secret relationships. 

ShipCrasher77: yet why are you on the council. 

The real force god: have you read my username? 

ShipCrasher77: good point. 

The real force god: anyways if you need me I'll be causing Kix to cry.

Sings in shower: how and why? 

The real force god: he's been evil. That's for me too know and you to find out. 

Sings in shower: did you really just answer my questions in reverse order?

The real force god: yes. Yes I did.


	9. Pickles

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: Who replaced all of my health drinks with pickle juice?

The real force god has changed GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY to Pickle-Man.

Pickle-Man: you did this didn't you. 

The real force god: Perhaps. 

Pickle-Man: why? 

The real force god: pickle juice is healthy. 

Pickle-Man: ok.... anyways what is this strange green sauce in my quarters? 

The real force god: pickle sauce.

Pickle-Man: what? 

The real force god: pickle sauce. I made it myself.

Please: what's it made of? 

The real force god: pasteified pickles, ketchup, and green food coloring. 

Sings in shower: 🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮

The real force god: 😇😇😇

Pickle-Man: ok bye I've got to go recognize the entire medbay. 

Pickle-man has left the chat.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be prepared. This gets sad.

The real force god: hey Ahsoka gets what.

Sings in shower: what

The real force god: you're even shorter now.

Sings in shower: WHAT?!?!?!?!?!

The real force god: yeah I grew another inch and a half. 

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: I hate you. 

YoungOldMan: me too.

The real force god: no you don't. 

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: you're right we don't. 

YoungOldMan: the puppy eyes are too much. 

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: it doesn't help that he has blackmail material on everyone. 

The real force god: *insert evil maniacal laughter*

ShipCrasher77: hey did you know that a movie was made based on Alex's visions of what would have happened if he was never here?

The real force god: WHAT.

ShipCrasher77: yeah we're going to watch it want to join us? 

ShipCrasher77: Alex?

Sings in shower: Kix and Greyhair just dragged him off to the medbay. 

ShipCrasher77: why?

Sings in shower: apparently they found him huddled in a corner saying names and something about deaths and leaving. 

ShipCrasher77: whose names?

Sings in shower: Mine, Hardcase's, Fives's, Jessie's, Kix's, Waxer's, Tup's, the Jedi, and other clones's names.

ShipCrasher77: anyways who's going to watch the movie with me?

ShipCrasher77: really? No one? 

Sings in shower: not after what Alex was saying. 

ShipCrasher77: Babies. 

ShipCrasher77 has left the chat. 

Sings in shower: hey Kix has Alex said anything else?

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: yeah he said three more names.

Sings in shower: who's? 

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: Anakin's, Obi Wan's, and Yoda's.

Sings in shower: I wonder why he said those names. 

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: I think most of them die based on what he's saying. 

Sings in shower: what did he say about me? 

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: he was saying 'No, Ahsoka, don't leave." 

Sings in shower: I'm so glad I won't be watching that movie. 

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: just said something about Rex.

Rexing Ball: what did he say about me?

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY: he said 'Rex, I'm sorry I couldn't save your men. Their deaths, especially Fives's, were in vain'.

Rexing Ball: so Fives dies. Along with all of my men.

Sings in shower: Alex said Fives's name but not Echo's name. Echo may still live.

Rexing Ball: Hopefully. 

GET-YOUR-SHEBS-TO-THE-MEDBAY has left the chat. 

Sings in shower has left the chat. 

Rexing Ball has left the chat.


End file.
